United Kingdom-based writer and mind coach Vex King is well known for his positive, inspirational and wisdom-based writing.
Recently Indian origin writer shared a beautiful piece of writing on his official Facebook page. He wrote:-
There are plenty of opinions around because they’re easy to produce and share. Some will even passionately defend their views if they’re strongly tied to their self-image or fuelled by heavy emotions and conditioning. Even when an authoritarian figure in our life means well by sharing their opinion, we must remember that no one knows us better than ourselves.
But we often need to remember this simple idea. For example, when someone passes judgement, we can take their response to us as a reflection of our identity. We now believe we are what we think that they think we are – and if this thought is deflating, damaging and disempowering, our self-worth and self-belief crumbles.
Sometimes, we adjust to these situations by accepting their fictional opinion as a fact about ourselves, especially if we want to feel accepted or avoid conflict.
When we disregard our intuition, values and needs so that we can remain safe and feel loved, we are essentially betraying ourselves. Self-betrayal is choosing something that isn’t choosing you. It encourages us to deprioritize our needs, suppress our feelings, hide aspects of our existence, play a false character and overextend ourselves to keep others happy. It’s an attempt to receive love, stay safe and feel validated by denying what’s true to you.
It becomes glaringly apparent that we’ve betrayed ourselves to some extent because there’s a sense of uneasiness, confusion and resentment that results from our choices. Disobeying our truths can also have us feeling trapped, overwhelmed, helpless and exhausted.
Self-love is knowing that some parts of you are just who you are and others aren’t – they are your hurt and self-perceived limitations. When we accept every aspect of our existence, including those that need nurturing and extra light, it becomes difficult for people’s opinions to control us. How can someone’s opinion of who you are, take your sanity away when you know who you are? You find it easier to let go when you know something isn’t truly aligned with you.
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